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I'm a twenty-nine year old Army wife currently living near a large Army post. I have an unhealthy obsession with Dr. Pepper, the Internet, cloth diapers, and ridiculous TV shows. I'm a stay at home mom to two beautiful daughters, AJ and Amelia. We also have a 6 year old beagle named Abby who is as dumb as a box of rocks.
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Thursday, January 26, 2012

Ham, Anyone?

Yesterday I was trying really hard to not feel bad for myself after AJ woke me up at 5:27 am and I left the dog sleeping in my bed. I mean, she has been a great sleeper up until now and its not really that big of a deal to wake up early when all you have to do is sit on the couch and drink coffee, making sure to keep the endless stream of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Yo Gabba Gabba playing, right?

Plus husband had to get up at O'dark Hundred for a 12 mile ruck march and had time to come home to shower and change before he had to be back at work, so I wasn't going to be the one to complain about being tired. I figured I'd leave the complaining to the dog.

I decided to make my day productive so I folded some laundry, ran a couple of loads through the wash and made homemade granola. I had the granola pans on the stove cooling and had just pulled the ham and kaiser rolls out of the freezer for dinner tonight when I decided to run to the grocery store real quickly. I had told husband earlier that I'd grab him some beer when AJ and I ran to the grocery store.

I pushed the granola pans back as far as they'd go on the counter so the dog couldn't get to them and made sure there were no glasses or cups within dog's reach before we left the house. About 30 minutes later we came back in and as I set the grocery sacks on the kitchen counter I noticed a piece of something on the carpet in the dining room. I walked over to get a closer look at what it was and I saw the ziploc bag that had the ham in it sitting on the dining room floor. Empty.

Yep, AbbyDog ate almost an entire Christmas ham while we were at the grocery store. I say almost because it was the ham we had for Christmas dinner, so there was about 3/4 of it left that I froze to use for ham & cheese sandwiches. I was really shocked that she was able to eat the whole thing, especially since it was several pounds and Abby only weighs about 35 pounds (more now). Then I remembered that she is a beagle and they have no self-control, or brains for that matter (as is evidenced by the time she ate an entire 1 pound bag of Hershey's kisses with the tinfoil wrappers still on them).

I decided at this point to let myself have a little pity party about the ham. I mean, come on. That was our dinner. Now what are we going to have?

I took AJ upstairs to put her down for her nap and I noticed something on her bed.

I kind of looked away, afraid that it was barf, but after closer inspection I realized that it was ham. It was the center part of the ham that was still very frozen and the dog apparently couldn't eat anymore of. In AJ's bed.

I really couldn't make this up if I tried. And thus continues my own personal struggle with ham.

4 comments:

  1. Oh no! This sounds like something that would happen in my house. I don't know if I would have laughed or cried when finding frozen ham on the bed.

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  2. I don't eat pork. And, no, it is not a religious thing. I just do not like the taste of pork. I say my taste buds changed because I used to love ham sandwiches and pepperoni pizza as a kid. Some people (my brothers) find it amusing that my initials are now HAM. For this reason, I refused to have ham at our wedding reception. I think someone did add ham to the meat tray without telling me though :)

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  3. How terrible! I think that is worth a little pity party....I probably would have screamed and cried a little.

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  4. Ohmygosh! Bad Abby Dog!! (I still love her though...) I had to laugh about the part where you said "I remembered she's a beagle and they have no self control." We used to have a beagle named Phoebe - that dog was the mischief queen. She once ate an entire (12 pack) box of poptarts - wrappers and all. At least Abby Dog went the more natural route with a ham. hehe.

    Also - tell AJ one of the perks of being little is getting to sleep in. She's gotta enjoy it while she can! :)

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