A New {Positive} Outlook on Life

I'm not naturally a very positive person. If you know me in real life, this will not come as a surprise to you. For those of you who have not yet had the pleasure of meeting me, this may be news to you. Some of you who are close to me may also know that I've dealt with depression in the past and am always wondering if I am exhibiting any symptoms.

I've found that since being here and getting involved in numerous activities including volunteering on post that I've been pretty happy with my life. I have several friends and find that the days I sit at home and do nothing are few and far between. This makes them a treat to me, instead of the norm. I think that getting involved and staying active, whether it is in organized activities or just with a group of friends really helps me to feel better about myself.

You might be wondering where this post is heading. Well, I have come to the realization lately after reading a few different (unintentionally motivational) blogs that the missing link needed for me to be truly happy is my attitude.

My reasoning is this.

I historically have a pretty crappy attitude.

I jump to conclusions and am quick to assume. This part of my personality is (understandably) not one of my favorites.

For example, D and I have been arguing a lot lately. I know, you're probably thinking, well, you have a baby, lots of couples argue a lot more during the "baby" stage. Well, sure, that's true, but then I sit back and think about what we're arguing about and I'll be honest. It's usually because I'm being ridiculous (sometimes its him, too, but its usually me). I read a post a few months ago that really put this into perspective for me. The author said something along the lines of, "when your partner does something that upsets you, stop and think about it. Did they do it to intentionally hurt you or make you angry? Probably not."

This advice really made me think about the reasons I get upset with D. Usually it has something to do with him loading the dishwasher wrong, or never remembering to take the garbage out. Does he do those things to make me mad? No. He does them because he doesn't think about it. Admittedly, this line of thinking has also made me reevaluate my Type-A personality. Is it really that important to me to have the dishwasher loaded in a certain way? I mean, as long as the dishes get clean, who cares?

I've also recently been reading several photography blogs and even though I'm not a photographer myself (and my camera is just a point and shoot), I find inspiration there as well. A few of the blogs just have this peace about them. The peace I find there inspires me to find the beauty in everyday things. It inspires me to look at things in a different light. It inspires me to stop and appreciate all that I have. It inspires me to focus on bringing calmness into my soul.

The most amazing thing about coming to this realization is the fact that I can already feel a calmness about myself. Instead of striving for perfection (which is bound to disappoint me, and who really needs their house to be spotless?), I will strive for peace, serenity, and contentment with the life in which I live.